Your reaction is similar to mine when I first heard these teachings. It's why I walked away from spirituality for years. We have to come to it when the time is right. I do not thnk anyone has certain knowledge, but I believe that over time, when you have worked with certain truths/teachings long enough they start to make sense. At least, that has been my experience. I always say, take what resonates and leave the rest. Often, what gets the biggest rise out of us, presents the wisdom we need the most, hidden by the pain we have yet to heal.

And I agree with you, I have been adament about reminding myself the next time around to not choose such difficult lessons!

A teacher that helped me a lot is author Ainslie MacLeod, he talks about past lives, soul planning, and soul age. Try this...

https://ainsliemacleod.com/wp-content/uploads/The-Old-Souls-Guidebook-Free-Chapter.pdf

It's a psf of his prologue for his Old Souls Guidebook, go to page 6, he explains better than I ever can how souls plan this life. <3